Damaged
by chaffsters33
Summary: After the Cullen's leave, Bella is attacked and raped in Port Angeles. Her anger overwhelms her and she vows to one day become a vampire and make them pay. They will all pay for her damages. Implied rape, not graphic. Read and review. by the way, GOLDFISH
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One:

Damaged

_Tick, tick, tick._

_Beep, beep, beep._

From my spot on the scratchy hospital blanket I could hear all the noise going on around me.

"What is the girl's name?" The old, haughty looking doctor asked.

"We don't know, the rapist must have stolen her wallet because she had nothing with her. She still won't speak." A young nurse replied. I hated that nurse. It wasn't that she mean or negligent, but she was the spitting image of my ex-best friend. Psh. My so-called "psychic" of a "best friend." I couldn't believe it. Even if she and her whole family had only been messing with my head before they left, how could they leave me to this fate? This broken, filthy, damaged fate.

I felt absolutely disgusting. My hair was tangled and matted. My nails were broken from trying to claw my way out of that hell hole of a situation. My broken ankle throbbed, along with the bruises on my stomach from the punches. I didn't even want to think about how much pain I was in down there. Yet still, none of this compared to the pain in my heart when I thought about him.

Did he even care when Alice told him? I was sure she must have seen it. I'll bet he didn't. After all, he probably had some new human danger magnet to look after now. The phrase, "What a douche" sprang to my mind. Despite my deep emotional turmoil I smiled at the words. They were the first that came to Angela's mind when I finally told her what really happened with Edward. I never knew she even had it in her.

I pressed the call button and a nurse came running in. I asked for a phone and called Angela. One of her little brothers answered.

"Hi, this is the Weber wesidence, how may I help you?"

"Hey, buddy, its Bella, can you get Angela for me? Its really important."

"Sure Belly, Guess what? I LOVE YOU!" The corners of my lips turned up at his words.

Angela picked up the phone, "Bella? Where are you? I thought we were going to have a movie night?"

A single tear escaped my eye, "Sorry, Ange. But, um, do you think you can come and get me?"

She heard the pain in my voice and switched to crisis mode, "Where are you Bella? I'll come get you."

"The hospital in Port Angeles."

Half an hour later, Angela barged into my room looking like she wanted to cry.

"Bella, I'm so sorry" she kept whispering when I told her about the man who had grabbed me when I left the video store.

The end of my story was interrupted by a duet of rage-filled voices. I recognized them as Jacob and Charlie. I mustered up a weak glare in Angela's direction and she looked apologetic. "I thought they should come see you.." She whispered apologetically.

I childishly turned my face away as my father and other best friend practically broke the door off the hinges. The anger slid off their faces when they saw the bruises and scrapes blooming on my pale skin.

Charlie pulled a chair up next to my bed, took my hand, and started to cry. Jacob, looked murderously angry and told me he would be back later. I only hoped that he would let the man survive long enough for me to get a shot at him. I was owed that, at least.

Late that night, after Charlie had gone home with Angela to pack some of my things, the memories of my vampire family started to overtake me. But this time I was not filled with sadness. I was angry. Who were they to think that they could waltz in and destroy my life? Were they really so spiteful as to want me to suffer so terribly? I thought of each one in turn.

Alice, my best friend. The one who left without saying goodbye. The one who didn't care enough about me to save me from getting raped. That bitch.

Jasper, the one who initiated the downfall. If he can't deal with a damn papercut how did he go to school with hundreds of kids getting them? It was probably planned that he would attack. Fuck him.

Emmett, my big brother. He was probably too stupid to realize how human react to being left. He was probably laughing at me. Idiot.

Rosalie, the honest one. She was the only one honest about her feelings for me. I should have taken her advice and gotten away before they hurt me. I should have listened to her.

Carlisle, my damn father figure. What kind of man allows his family to behave in such a way? How many acting lessons did it take to perfect his "compassion"? Why didn't he just let me die when James attacked. Life would have been so much easier.

Esme. I couldn't believe I ever thought of her as a mother. She left, along with the rest, without a second thought. How can a mother abandon someone she considers a child?

And lastly, Edward. My face turned dark with pain and anger. That liar. That bastard. He toyed with my life and broke it in pieces. Did he get his jollies from watching me scream for him not to leave? He probably thought I was pathetic. Hell, even I thought I was pathetic, mourning over that monster. Because he truly was a monster. He was a bully. He was abusive. I now understood why he so vehemently refused to make me one of them. He didn't give a shit about me and my soul, he just wanted to be able to move on with out a scorned vampire on his trail. I couldn't even think of a strong enough word to describe how much I hated him. I truly did. I hated him so much that it tore the hole in my chest even further open, if that was even possible. But why then, did he care if I was reckless with my life? I would make him pay. I would do the things that he told me not to. They would all pay. Somehow, I was going to find a way to become a vampire and I would find them. Of course, I didn't know how easy that would be.


	2. Hateful Words

**Disclaimer; I don't own jack shit! WOOOOOOOOOOO!**

**Sorry its taken so long to get this up, I've been really busy. Please read and review and tell me if you think I should continue. Criticism and ideas are welcome! Heck, you could just say something like "Chicken nuggets." I'd be cool with that too.**

**Chapter two: Hateful Words**

You might say I had a death wish. Technically, I guess I did if you considered looking for someone to infect you with venom and stop your heart. A few days after the attack, I came home to my normal lifestyle. The strangest thing was Charlie's behavior. After his initial meltdown, he knew exactly how to act around me. He didn't push me for details, or get overly angry or emotional. I guess all his years as police chief had paid off.

But I guess all that experience wasn't enough to stop his only child from being raped. I couldn't believe I had been so stupid to take a back alley to my car after leaving the video store. I could barely look at myself in the mirror without feeling the need to scratch my own eyes out. Each night when I took a shower I scrubbed and scrubbed with strong soap and scorching water, but I didn't feel clean. My bruises were still dark and purple and the scars from my stitches were vibrant.

And each time I saw the crescent scar on my hand I felt overwhelmingly angry. If they hadn't left this wouldn't have happened. If they cared for me at all it wouldn't have happened. If I hadn't met them this wouldn't have happened. If I never moved to Forks--- I had to stop doing this to myself. I knew it was hurting me to be angry at them but it was easier than dealing with the shame and sense of loss that I felt. If I could continue blaming someone other than myself I might survive this.

Three days after I got home from the hospital, I was sitting in my room reading a pamphlet about rape victims. My skin was bright red and hot after my shower. It was bleeding in some spots where I had scrubbed too hard. Blood didn't bother me anymore after all I had been through.

I heard a noise outside on the street. It sounded like the screeching of a car. I disregarded it and tried to focus on what I was reading. My doctor had recommended that I read it and seek therapy. I promised her I would read it, but I didn't want to talk to anyone about this. It was too personal to me. The only person who knew anything was Angela. She didn't push me to talk about it. Angela was good with boundaries.

The wind blew a branch and it scraped against my bedroom window. To block out the noise of the storm I walked over to my stereo and turned on some music. Linkin Park blared from the speakers. I leaned down to pick the pamphlet off the floor when I realized there was something outside my window. My breathing hitched and within a second the lock on the window had broken and the figure gracefully glided through the window.

Alice landed on the desk and catapulted herself over to me. Her stone arms circled around me.

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I was in South America when I had a vision. I was too far away to help you. Are you okay? Why are you bleeding? Bella—What's wrong?" I had stood completely still through her tirade. I was so angry at the fact that she still thought she could bust into my house and violate my personal space. We were not best friends. My eyes narrowed as she pulled back to look at me. Alice looked shocked and confused and concerned all at the same time. I jerked out of her arms and tried to control my temper.

"What the hell do you think you are doing here?" I demanded.

"I was-I was just trying to see if you were okay..."

"Who the fuck told you that you have the right to know how I am? You don't give a shit about me! I don't doubt for one second that your story is crap. You say you saw what was going to happen to me in a vision but you were "too far away"? Why the hell didn't you just call me and tell me not to go to the video store?" My face started burning and I could barely see Alice's despicable face, I was so angry.

"Bella, you're my best friend! I don't understand--"

I cut her off, "I don't know what you don't understand because you sure as hell didn't expect me to be waiting for you to come back. Best friend?" I scoffed, "A best friend wouldn't abandon me the day her boyfriend broke her heart and turn a blind eye while she was being raped. That's not how it works."

Alice flinched visibly at the word rape, looking destroyed at my words. She opened her mouth to speak but I silenced her.

"Get out. I don't want to see your lying face around me ever again." My words were calm but fire danced in my eyes. My fingers clenched and my nails broke the skin on my palms. Alice's eyes visibly darkened and I took my chance. "Oh, I forgot. This was probably all you came for. That is all you're about isn't it? Blood? Fine, take it then." I wiped my palm across the shoulder of her jacket and escaped in to the bathroom. I jumped into the shower fully clothed and turned the water on high again. I could see blood swirling down the shower drain and the heat overwhelmed me. I sank to the floor of the shower and struggled to hold on to my consciousness.

When I returned to my room Alice was gone. Everything looked as it had before our fight and I wondered if I had imagined it all. A piece of paper on my desk caught my eye. Alice's delicate script had scrawled "I'm sorry" and a phone number on the piece of paper.

I tumbled on to my bed while animalistic sobs tore through me. The burning hole in my chest tore a bit more. Being angry was not as easy as I thought.

**Wooooosh. Chapta 2. Whaddya think? **

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